Antique stores are awesome in Austria…and a bit terrifying.

We’re home!  We flew through Chicago during Fropocalypse, so that was a nightmare…another story for another post.  Today, we’re going back in time to when I was still in Austria. It was our last day in Kirchberg, Volker was ready to hit the slopes (fully dressed in ski garb ready) but as soon as he […]

Everyone should own a floating head.

Last week, I was roaming the streets of Innsbruck with Volker and Rachel when we happened upon a store full of awesome.  Antique books and paintings and jewelry and super cool stuff.   Me:  Holy…What the balls?  That is AWESOME! Volker:  What is it? Me:  I was just about to ask you (That took me […]

MOST of the traditions here I LOVE, Volker.

New Year’s Eve in Austria is amazing.  Seriously, this group knows how to celebrate.  We start by eating six courses of awesome for dinner. After dinner, we roll ourselves outside, have a few drinks and await the countdown.  As soon as the clock strikes 12, guests of the hotel (and several locals) cheer, kiss their […]

Mangled in translation -or- I’m gonna need my tongue sandblasted

As soon as we land in Germany, we’re on the hunt for these… Volker was in charge of grabbing them and somehow, he picked up these instead… They weren’t steak flavored instead of peanut butter.  Nope.  That might have been ingestible.  They were steak AND peanut butter.  I can just imagine the face you’re making […]

Abducted by aliens would have been a better story.

Remember how I said I’d explain my hiatus later,  well, it’s later… I’m a good person.  Ask anyone.  However, I can’t help but be suspicious that I’ve pissed off some higher power whose main objective for all of eternity is  kicking the shit out of me…well, honestly, with all the meds I take, that’s the […]

It’s an almost-Christmas miracle. Miracle is too strong…surprise, maybe or just post. It’s an almost-Christmas post.

It’s been over two months – I know, I’ll explain* later – but today, it’s Christmas (sort of – at least it’s still December).  Happy Holidays!  We’re back in Austria to celebrate the season.  I love this place. We got here in time to celebrate Christmas Eve.  The guests of the hotel gather around and […]

F*Bomb Alert! Several F*Bombs, actually. It’s the name of a town, people!

I’m placing this picture here so the next picture doesn’t show up on your social media site, unless you want it to – then, well…sorry? Real post starts now. Not often do I plead with my husband to take me on a road trip when we’re in Kirchberg, but when I saw that this town […]

Customs doesn’t need to know

I bought this for my dad at the Munich airport. Me:  Look what I found for my dad, dick nougat! Volker:  What!?  That’s wrong on so many levels. Me:  It says Wiener Nougat but dick is another name for wiener so it’s the same thing. Volker:  I don’t think your dad’s going to eat that. […]

Freckles on her nose diddle diddle dee…

I was singing Pippi Longstocking on top of the mountain in Austria. So many people commented on my excellent vocal abilities and impeccable song choice. Me:  ‘Du suck’ is German for ‘awesome, thank you, sing louder!’ Volker:  No. It’s English. Me:  That’s not possible.  It’s some obscure Austrian dialect. Volker:  No it’s not.  Please stop […]

Apparently, I’m an idiot in two languages. I’m bi-idiot, bidiot.

My husband is German, so in keeping with his family tradition, we spend Christmas in Austria every year – SCORE!  Here’s a picture. Pretty. So, the other day, I was supposed to take the bus from one of the ski lifts back into Kirchberg. My family skis.  I pretend ski, which means I slide from […]