D is for Do-Over and Dog

I’m taking a mulligan and approaching this A to Z Challenge a bit differently than when I started three days ago.  I’m still figuring this blog thing out.  Yes, I’m playing the “I’m new” card again.  How long do I get with that card?  6 months? A year?  Either way, I still have time.

My mulligan for the A to Z challenge is:  I’m getting a theme, y’all.  Since I’m new, as I point out often, I thought I’d run the alphabet with a bit of history.  Here’s to over sharing…

D is for Dog

When I was around 8 years old, I had a dog.  I don’t know where he came from, animals just showed up at our house.  We mostly had cats.  Not inside cats, these were alley cats that hung out at our house like it was some kind of cat bar where they could make friends, get some food, and apparently have lots of kittens (kittens were everywhere, the garage, the shed, under the house – Oh my gosh, y’all, we had a cat brothel.)  Other than the cat whores, there was one dog, Pierre Mon Frere.  I named him.  He was white and fluffy and I taught him tricks.  I loved this dog.

Pierre Mon Frere became sick one day and he died.  I was heart broken.  My mom and stepdad sat me down and explained that Pierre had eaten a houseplant.

Ever since that day, I’ve told the story of Pierre and the houseplant and people would look at me a bit suspect and say, “Really?  He died from a houseplant?”   Of course he did!  That’s what my mother told me so it must be true.

Turns out, not so much.

My sister was visiting last month and we were talking about pets.

Sheli:  Remember that dog we had that died because Gordon stepped on him?

Me:  That never happened.  We only had one dog, Pierre Mon Frere, and he died from eating a houseplant.

Sheli:  Yeah, no he didn’t.  Gordon drunk killed him.  We didn’t even have houseplants.

Me:  Oh my God.  What!?

Sheli:  He felt really bad about it.

Me:  Well, I would hope so!  He killed my dog?  He KILLED my dog!  WHAT!?  Not a houseplant?  My whole life is a lie.   What else isn’t true?

Sheli:  Have you heard about Santa?

By the way, Gordon was our stepdad – NO PUN INTENDED!  I’m sure there are a lot of things from my childhood that didn’t actually happen quite the way it was explained to me.   For the record, I do not want to know the truth.  I would like this truth erased from my brain.  Sometimes it’s best to let dead dogs lie.

 

German American – language lesson #35

Was zur Hölle!? (vas zur hole-la) What the hell!? – These German lessons aren’t always cuss words but this story deserved one.

Comments

  1. Excuse the pun, but I thought a cat brothel was called a cathouse…………..just sayin……….

  2. My D would be “damn doggie diarrhea”. Last two nights dog has done it in hallway…first time he’s ever had accidents in the house.

    • julieyoujest says:

      Poor guy. Otis does that if we even think about changing his food. Nasty! Oh and poor you for having to clean it up!

  3. What a sad, yet funny read. I can only imagine how shocking it would be to learn the truth of that lie! As for playing the ‘new card’ – I don’t think that gets old, does it? (smile)

    • julieyoujest says:

      Hi! Oh, I hope so. I could use that card daily!

      I was so shocked my mind had a hard time following what was happening! I’d been preaching the cautionary tale of dogs and houseplants for over 30 years.

  4. “Gordon drunk killed him.”

    OMG, I’m choking right now. It’s so not funny…but it’s funny. I’m so sorry!
    Kelly @ Dysfunctionally Functional recently posted…F is for . . .My Profile

    • julieyoujest says:

      My sister almost peed herself laughing, so you’re not alone. She also couldn’t believe that I’d bought mom’s explanation for all of these years. I might be a tad bit gullible.

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